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The idiot who honks one millisecond after the light turns green (1 Viewer)

Courtjester said:
Good post!!

However, the number of red light runners is out of control. For your safety or your family's safety, you need to take that couple second pause before going on green.  Now over five seconds, I start doing the creep up on the bumper move (especially when I am in my Tahoe) --longer than that, you are getting a honk.
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Excellent post

 
Bossman said:
Monday a.m. I was at a drive thru getting coffee.

I'm 3rd car from the pickup window. First car drives off. Guy in front of me doesn't move.

Waiting. Drive thru worker sticks his arm out the window and waves the guy to come up. Still doesn't move.

Quick honk. Dude puts down his phone and drives up to the window.

Am I "that guy"?
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Of course not. Your behavior here is totally reasonable. I mean the jack hole third back from the light who basically honks if he has any doubt that the green light signal is not electrically connected to the accelerator in the first car. These people are morons. Instafinger from me in response (even if I’m not the first car, or even in that same lane). 

 
Otis said:
Of course not. Your behavior here is totally reasonable. I mean the jack hole third back from the light who basically honks if he has any doubt that the green light signal is not electrically connected to the accelerator in the first car. These people are morons. Instafinger from me in response (even if I’m not the first car, or even in that same lane). 
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You should look to see if it's a co-worker ... laughing his ### off as you give bird.

 
I don’t instahonk, but when I hit the horn, i hold it for a couple seconds in an attempt to deter the behavior in the future. 

 
you will never have to hit the horn on me because i view every red light as a chance to prove that i could beat none other than don big daddy garlits himself in an off the line drag race so i try to keep her revved up for a massive neutral drop and hit every green light like its the alcohol funny car finals and pride is on the line so hey go ahead and honk at the old swcer if you want but by the time you do i am already three car lengths out take that to the bank bromigos 

 
AhrnCityPahnder said:
3  to 5 seconds green, and you havent moved, you're getting a honk.   I'm that guy.

COME AT ME BRO
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2 seconds and you are getting the honk from me, not so much for me, but for the poor sap several cars back who is not going to make that iteration of the light thanks to the inconsiderate and inattentive effort of the guy first in line.  If you are first in line you have an obligation to those behind you.

 
Otis said:
Makes me stabby every time. Is there a worse guy out there?

Statisticslly speaking, some of you guys must do this. Wish there were a way to out you all and then permaban. 
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I do not have an issue with this since it seems that 95%+ are on their phones.

 
If first in line guy is on his phone and makes you wait three seconds or more I believe it is appropriate to toss a pit bull in with him if he has a sun roof or window open, or better yet a convertible.  This is really the only legitimate use for a pit bull.

See what I did there, I combined Otis threads for the sheer joy of what it might bring.   

 
Reminds me of an incident I had.  Less than two weeks ago.  Let me set the stage.  

Getting off the highway to my exit, I drive every day for the past year and a half, there are two left turn lanes and a right turn lane.  The street that I am turing right onto has two lanes to turn right onto.  Problem is, 1/4 mile up the street is another light where the right lane is right turn only and the left lane goes straight.  I need to go straight.  

The left lane that I need to get into is backed up THROUGH the intersection (this is a separate pet peeve), but no cars are coming from the left.  This douchenozzle behind me is honking at me to turn right when the light is still red.  I clearly can't get into the lane I need to, and I know this, so I don't move.  

Light turns green.  There's still cars in the intersection, so I wait.  I can see the cars in the left lane are starting to move about 100 yards up and know I have about 3 seconds before I will be able to turn into the lane I need.   The alternative, I guess, is to turn into the right lane, and then sit there trying to get over into the left lane.  Either way, this kokgobbler is going to be waiting on me.  He starts laying on the horn.  

Of course the only response to this was to slowly roll down the window, give him a brooklyn salute, and roll it back up and then calmly turn into the left lane so I can go home.  

If it wasn't for people getting shot and killed for less, I probably would have just sat there through another light.  Just to prove how cool I am. 

 
Assuming this is a city thing. People rarely if ever use a horn where I live under most circumstances. Maybe, just maybe, if someone was stopped at a light I could see a small tap on the horn, but it would be a friendly thing. 

 
Otis said:
Makes me stabby every time. Is there a worse guy out there?

Statisticslly speaking, some of you guys must do this. Wish there were a way to out you all and then permaban. 
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I hear ya, and I rarely use a horn, but get off your phone.

 
Dedfin said:
Im a super laid back driver. I let people cut me off all the time and all that stuff. Ill never understand  people that get stressed behind the wheel.
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I was a passenger for about 3.5 hours yesterday with someone who thought every single person that impeded his progress had a personal vendetta against him. People using the left lane to pass, sometimes at easily 10 MPH over the speed limit, who inevitably get in his way because his Ford truck is traveling at ludicrous speed..... these people are instantly #######s. Somehow there's another gear within the engine of the 1.5 ton piece of machinery and he accelerates right up the rear end of each car to seemingly make some sort of point about who's road everyone is on. Each new vehicle that does this is greeted with more and more aggressive driving as if these people are in kahoots in and conspiring against him en masse. You could just hear the blood pressure boil a little more as the number of instances built up. 

Honestly feared for my life once as he accelerated so fast on someone, if that person even tapped on their brakes, he would have rear ended the car. In all honesty, the person was wrong in what they were doing because she somehow didn't see the blur of white with the sonic boom cloud  behind it that was approaching in her mirrors, but he makes it worse by not realizing that there's two damn pedals under his feet and slammed on the gas. Easily got within a foot of the other car before he finally found the breaks. After I questioned what he's doing and foolishly comment on my desire to get home to my wife and child, he just shrugged it off with a 'I wasn't going to hit her, Epic'  because this guy seems to think that he has superhuman reflexes and can hit his breaks before the light of the taillight in front of him reaches his eyes. That combined with some sort of super brake system that every other vehicle on the road is green with envy with somehow leaves us impervious to the dangers of the highway. Never mind the fact that we have 650 lbs of humans in that  1.5 ton truck and another probably 250 lbs of crap in the flatbed and the car he's pulling up on is Honda Civic with one person in it. 

 
Dan Lambskin said:
I make sure to take extra time and accelerate very slowly if I get honked at.  Will usually drive 5-10 mph under the limit until they pass me
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You are the worst form of life on this  planet.  If you have nothing to do, get out of the way.  Where I come from we have this thing called a forearm shiver.  Hopefully you get one sooner rather than later.

 
sbonomo said:
You are the worst form of life on this  planet.  If you have nothing to do, get out of the way.  Where I come from we have this thing called a forearm shiver.  Hopefully you get one sooner rather than later.
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Oddly enough, he suddenly has something to do. Bother #######s. 

 
sbonomo said:
You are the worst form of life on this  planet.  If you have nothing to do, get out of the way.  Where I come from we have this thing called a forearm shiver.  Hopefully you get one sooner rather than later.
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If you’re in that big of a hurry you should have left 5 minutes earlier 

 
If I'm alone in my car, I say out loud "Notice it's green, foot off brake, move to gas, go."

If by the time I'm done saying that, they haven't moved, I tap the courtesy horn. If they don't seem to react after that, i just lay into it and have some fun. Especially in the Bay area, where the left turn traffic lights are ####### moronic and don't have a yield option while the light is plain green in both ways, if you cause a couple people to miss the green arrow and wait the eons it takes for these terribly timed traffic lights to get back around to them, I think you're a giant #####.

 
 I think certain people myself included should be able to shoot people that drive bad and don't pay attention when driving (cell phone person who has to have their head buried in the phone constantly).  I do a lot of driving and the number of people who drive with one hand and have a cell phone in the other is crazy.  Texting and driving into other lanes of traffic happens on the daily.   

As for the green light slow poke learn to drive with both feet!   One on the brake and one on the gas.  

1. Put foot on the brake pedal

2. Put foot on the gas pedal

3. Push gas pedal to the floor until you see your RPM's in the RED LINE area 

4. When the light turns green release brake pedal and launch yourself down the street.    

America thanks you 

 
Instinctive said:
If I'm alone in my car, I say out loud "Notice it's green, foot off brake, move to gas, go."

If by the time I'm done saying that, they haven't moved, I tap the courtesy horn. If they don't seem to react after that, i just lay into it and have some fun. Especially in the Bay area, where the left turn traffic lights are ####### moronic and don't have a yield option while the light is plain green in both ways, if you cause a couple people to miss the green arrow and wait the eons it takes for these terribly timed traffic lights to get back around to them, I think you're a giant #####.
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do you say that with some kind of cartoon accent, like pepe lepieu? 

 
Longer than 3 seconds = beep beep… longer than 5 = honk.  I'll do it from 5 cars back, too.

For those of you that sit on your phone during a traffic light then get upset when you get honked at "instantly", put your phone down and pay attention.  I bet you never get honked at then.

 
Caesar said:
Reminds me of an incident I had.  Less than two weeks ago.  Let me set the stage.  

Getting off the highway to my exit, I drive every day for the past year and a half, there are two left turn lanes and a right turn lane.  The street that I am turing right onto has two lanes to turn right onto.  Problem is, 1/4 mile up the street is another light where the right lane is right turn only and the left lane goes straight.  I need to go straight.  

The left lane that I need to get into is backed up THROUGH the intersection (this is a separate pet peeve), but no cars are coming from the left.  This douchenozzle behind me is honking at me to turn right when the light is still red.  I clearly can't get into the lane I need to, and I know this, so I don't move.  

Light turns green.  There's still cars in the intersection, so I wait.  I can see the cars in the left lane are starting to move about 100 yards up and know I have about 3 seconds before I will be able to turn into the lane I need.   The alternative, I guess, is to turn into the right lane, and then sit there trying to get over into the left lane.  Either way, this kokgobbler is going to be waiting on me.  He starts laying on the horn.  

Of course the only response to this was to slowly roll down the window, give him a brooklyn salute, and roll it back up and then calmly turn into the left lane so I can go home.  

If it wasn't for people getting shot and killed for less, I probably would have just sat there through another light.  Just to prove how cool I am. 
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Personally, I think you should be turning right into the open lane and then make your way into the left lane.  Yes, he may still have to wait, but 1/4 mile is a decent distance and more than enough time to put on your blinker and make it over instead of blocking an open 1/4 mile lane of road. 

Sorry, but this a pet peeve of mine too.  I see it regularly with people that are turning right and have to turn left after a little bit.  It's a 2 or 3 lane road and they wait until all lanes are free so they can immediately get over to make their turn 3-4 intersections up ahead.  Make the turn into the open lane and then get over before you turn left.  It simply isn't that difficult and there's no reason to keep a line of cars waiting so that you don't have to make a single lane change over the next 500-1000 ft.

 
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Epic Problem said:
I was a passenger for about 3.5 hours yesterday with someone who thought every single person that impeded his progress had a personal vendetta against him. People using the left lane to pass, sometimes at easily 10 MPH over the speed limit, who inevitably get in his way because his Ford truck is traveling at ludicrous speed..... these people are instantly #######s. Somehow there's another gear within the engine of the 1.5 ton piece of machinery and he accelerates right up the rear end of each car to seemingly make some sort of point about who's road everyone is on. Each new vehicle that does this is greeted with more and more aggressive driving as if these people are in kahoots in and conspiring against him en masse. You could just hear the blood pressure boil a little more as the number of instances built up. 

Honestly feared for my life once as he accelerated so fast on someone, if that person even tapped on their brakes, he would have rear ended the car. In all honesty, the person was wrong in what they were doing because she somehow didn't see the blur of white with the sonic boom cloud  behind it that was approaching in her mirrors, but he makes it worse by not realizing that there's two damn pedals under his feet and slammed on the gas. Easily got within a foot of the other car before he finally found the breaks. After I questioned what he's doing and foolishly comment on my desire to get home to my wife and child, he just shrugged it off with a 'I wasn't going to hit her, Epic'  because this guy seems to think that he has superhuman reflexes and can hit his breaks before the light of the taillight in front of him reaches his eyes. That combined with some sort of super brake system that every other vehicle on the road is green with envy with somehow leaves us impervious to the dangers of the highway. Never mind the fact that we have 650 lbs of humans in that  1.5 ton truck and another probably 250 lbs of crap in the flatbed and the car he's pulling up on is Honda Civic with one person in it. 
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Who are these people? People are so crazy when they get into a car to go from a mild natured sweet person into mad max.

 
Down here the slow start is an epidemic.. slow functioning southern brains IMO. I’m giving a quick tap tap at around 2-3 seconds. 

Just today I got instahonk guy behind me though.. I mean it MIGHT have been a third of a second. #### that guy... he got a finger  :lol:  

 
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Dedfin said:
Who are these people? People are so crazy when they get into a car to go from a mild natured sweet person into mad max.
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And he is exactly that, but get him on the highway and look the hell out. 

I think part of the problem with this friend is that he’s a Harley guy and with that comes the mentality of ‘if I haven’t died on that thing yet, there’s no way I can die in this fortress of steel.’

 
Epic Problem said:
And he is exactly that, but get him on the highway and look the hell out. 

I think part of the problem with this friend is that he’s a Harley guy and with that comes the mentality of ‘if I haven’t died on that thing yet, there’s no way I can die in this fortress of steel.’
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I hope that you are through riding with this a hole?

 
Kanil said:
Longer than 3 seconds = beep beep… longer than 5 = honk.  I'll do it from 5 cars back, too.

For those of you that sit on your phone during a traffic light then get upset when you get honked at "instantly", put your phone down and pay attention.  I bet you never get honked at then.
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You’re wrong. Yes I’ve looked at my phone at lights on occasion. Im not complaining about that. Happens to the best of us, either in conversation, or turning to hand the kids a snack in the back seat, or whatever. I mean the jack holes who instahonk, to the point that even if I were intently staring at the light ready to charge, that idiot was still going to honk. 

Oh BTW people are colossal idiots. It’s why they buy pit bulls. It’s why they instahonk and just generally are poor drivers.  They’re, on average, maddeningly stupid. 

 
We have more if the opposite problem here. People will go through red lights if they think they can get away with it. Cops could make their monthly quota around here.

 
Otis said:
You’re wrong. Yes I’ve looked at my phone at lights on occasion. Im not complaining about that. Happens to the best of us, either in conversation, or turning to hand the kids a snack in the back seat, or whatever. I mean the jack holes who instahonk, to the point that even if I were intently staring at the light ready to charge, that idiot was still going to honk. 

Oh BTW people are colossal idiots. It’s why they buy pit bulls. It’s why they instahonk and just generally are poor drivers.  They’re, on average, maddeningly stupid. 
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How much overlap do you think there is between pit bull owners and instahonkers?

 
Caesar said:
Reminds me of an incident I had.  Less than two weeks ago.  Let me set the stage.  

Getting off the highway to my exit, I drive every day for the past year and a half, there are two left turn lanes and a right turn lane.  The street that I am turing right onto has two lanes to turn right onto.  Problem is, 1/4 mile up the street is another light where the right lane is right turn only and the left lane goes straight.  I need to go straight.  

The left lane that I need to get into is backed up THROUGH the intersection (this is a separate pet peeve), but no cars are coming from the left.  This douchenozzle behind me is honking at me to turn right when the light is still red.  I clearly can't get into the lane I need to, and I know this, so I don't move.  

Light turns green.  There's still cars in the intersection, so I wait.  I can see the cars in the left lane are starting to move about 100 yards up and know I have about 3 seconds before I will be able to turn into the lane I need.   The alternative, I guess, is to turn into the right lane, and then sit there trying to get over into the left lane.  Either way, this kokgobbler is going to be waiting on me.  He starts laying on the horn.  

Of course the only response to this was to slowly roll down the window, give him a brooklyn salute, and roll it back up and then calmly turn into the left lane so I can go home.  

If it wasn't for people getting shot and killed for less, I probably would have just sat there through another light.  Just to prove how cool I am. 
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You should’ve turned them stopped like 15 feet down the right lane with your left blinker on till someone let you in. 

 
Otis said:
Makes me stabby every time. Is there a worse guy out there?

Statisticslly speaking, some of you guys must do this. Wish there were a way to out you all and then permaban. 
Click to expand...
Stop looking at your phone.

 
I never understand the finger reaction to a honk. If I were to realize I wasn't paying full attention and got a honk, I'd assume I might have been waiting longer than I should have. If I were to know it was an actual instant honk, I'd assume the honk was about something else, and possibly not even directed at me. 

 
I mean, maybe there was a guy with a knife in your backseat and he popped up a little before the light turned green. The guy behind you noticed and honked to scare him and alert you. He saved your life and you're busy cursing him out. 

Ingrate.

 
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