I've been meaning to reply to this - sorry for the delay.
Anyway, I agree that many (most?) patents are awful to read. I think most patent attorneys try to make them readable, but they are definitely filled with legalese. Part of the problem is that clients want to go as broad as possible. So if somebody invents a widget that has three beams that form a triangle and a wheel at each end of the triangle, they might say "well it could work with only two wheels or only two beams". The beams could be connected in the shape of a triangle but could be other shapes. Thus we end up drafting something takes a simple triangle with 3 wheels and turns it into "a geometric shape having a plurality of support members having at least one wheel." If we don't cover all of the possibilities, then company A makes a minor change to the widget and can get around your patent. It just gets unwieldy and it's no more fun to write than it is to read. I'd prefer to make them easier to write and read, but we definitely don't do it to keep ourselves employed.
In short, don't blame those of us that write the patent applications,
blame the litigators