Dear makers of Elf on a shelf (2 Viewers)

[bagger]

first year doing this...the elf should have piping in the back so it sits up better.

ours look like some drunken elf slouched over against a picture frame.

but yah, on day 2 i am already like fml i got to move thhis stupid thing again.

but that cookie eating thing is great. i am going to have it start taking my sons toys and holding it hostage until he does chose for me. are there elf on the shelf accessorieslike a shiv on a shelf?

tia

 

[Jaysus]

first year doing this...the elf should have piping in the back so it sits up better.

Hack your Elf

 

[AcerFC]

first year doing this...the elf should have piping in the back so it sits up better.

Hack your Elf

This is ridiculous

 

[Carver]

At our house, "Elisa Snowflake" (our elf is a girl) got into what's left of the Halloween candy last night, leaving candy wrappers all over the kitchen counter.

DIH

 

[Carver]

Too late to jump on this money train??

They make a black one yet? "Elfro"? How about a Rican? "El'F"?

 

[Ray Karpis]

I woke up this morning to a low humming noise.

Little *******...

 

[tdoss]

Don't try to institute this when your kids are teens.

My wife brought it home and was having fun with it the first couple of nights by putting it in funny situations only to wake up Saturday morning to it hanging by its neck with an iPod charger cord from the ceiling fan. For added measure, my son turned the fan on low so the elf was spinning slowly around and around as she entered the room.

My son tells me he had a thought of taking the elf's head and mounting it on our desert tortoise (ala Breaking Bad) but because the weather change he couldn't find him because he's dug in hibernated somewhere.Snitch's don't do we'll in my household

Tortuga!"Hola, DEA.

"Hola, Sanchito Clause!"

 

[Black Sunshine]

I woke up this morning to a low humming noise.

Little *******...

What, no Bat on the Shelf?

 

[MikeIke]

I woke up this morning to a low humming noise.

Little *******...

 

[sho nuff]

first year doing this...the elf should have piping in the back so it sits up better.

Hack your Elf

This is ridiculous

Actually, I like it.Not so far to actually do the sewing. But I am going to hot glue some velcro on to ours and also attach some velcro to magnets to help him climb things or hang in some places he has not been able to.

 

[netnalp]

Pose him like he's about to give the command to "fire" to some storm troopers or army men. Have a few blindfolded Lego people lined up. Little cigarette's would be a nice touch.

 

[Braktastic]

Woke up to this today.

Elf is getting way too comfortable in my house

I guess if the elf touches himself he doesn't lose his magic? I'm not cleaning up that elf's mess.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

I have no idea what is going in in here.

 

[Kirby]

Email santa and see if he will mail you a lil package of magic dust(glitter) and sprinkle it on the elf.

 

[JHuber77]

Too late to jump on this money train??They make a black one yet? "Elfro"? How about a Rican? "El'F"?

They have one with brown skin and black hair. Don't know if he is a Boricua though

 

[NYCelt]

Third year in our hose with Elfie. I have forgotten three times already this year and told the kids I told Elfie not to leave because Santa would have had gotten some bad reports. Also told them that is the last time I am saving them from the bad list. Running out of excuses. Great tradition though as the kids love it.

elfie?

That is the creative name my son came up with when he was three. You have to name the elf.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

first year doing this...the elf should have piping in the back so it sits up better.

Hack your Elf

Mrs. SLB bought one of these recently. The boys promptly named Sparky for some reason. As posted in the GMTAN, Cal (who is 8 and I planned on telling him he should be worshiping the ground I walk on and not Santa after this Christmas) says "if I wake up and that thing is watching me in my bed, I'm going nuts."

I kind of like the prop shtick though. Think I'll have Sparky drinking my whiskey tonight.

ETA

My Grandmother always had one of these things, my Mom claims to still have it. Thing was from the 50's and ALWAYS freaked me out as a kid when I went to my Grandparents house.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

I have no idea what is going in in here.

Women have found another way to waste money.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

I woke up this morning to a low humming noise.

Little *******...

Good Lord.

 

[Billy Bats]

My ex is doing Elf On A Shelf for the first time this year, kids are 8 and 4 and love it.Problem is that she spent her wad too early on Elfie (his name) creative ways. So far the elf has done the followingecorated the Christmas tree with the kid's underwearRaced Ken in two Barbie cars. Both drivers had Barbies riding with them.Shared a "drink" with Barbie as both had straws in a bottle of maple syrup. Playing a game of UNO with other stuffed animalsRiding a paper origami dragon that was also moved out of the room it is normally in.Spelled his name in toothpaste on the bathroom mirrorVandalized a Christmas photo of the kids with Santa, giving everyone crazy hair and beards with a sharpie.Playing Angry Birds. Performing a ukulele concert in front of a crowd of about 20 stuffed animals.Thankfully I only have to come up with about 4 ideas for the nights I have them before Christmas.

Well, that certainly explains the 'ex' part of your relationship with her. Decorated the Xmas tree with the kid's underwear?? I don't... I can't... wtf?

 

[shuke]

Creepy

My kids love it, but they also put towels around the bottom of their bedroom doors at night. They are a little creeped out by his running around at night.

Try living with all of these.

As for our "real" elf, I forgot to move him the first 4 nights this year. Just told the kids he was probably pretty comfortable.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Creepy

My kids love it, but they also put towels around the bottom of their bedroom doors at night. They are a little creeped out by his running around at night.

Try living with all of these.

As for our "real" elf, I forgot to move him the first 4 nights this year. Just told the kids he was probably pretty comfortable.

Horrifying. Asked the wife if she knew about this creepy elf trend. Of course she did and was thinking of getting an elf for our little guy. Then she realized that he has an irrational fear of "Gingy" from Shrek and a taking "Finn" doll from Adventure Time, so maybe not.

 

[bakes]

My kids are firmly in the "Santa has advanced technology to know if you've been bad or good so he doesn't need a low tech stuffed elvish minion" camp.

Thing is creepy and looks like it would try and hump the cat if it had a chance.

 

[playin4beer]

Like I said, our Elf just moves around each night... inspired a little bit by this thread, I changed it up a little last night..

Cheery Elf was found this morning in the driver's seat of a pink corvette with a brunette barbie in the passenger seat...

 

[AcerFC]

Like I said, our Elf just moves around each night... inspired a little bit by this thread, I changed it up a little last night..Cheery Elf was found this morning in the driver's seat of a pink corvette with a brunette barbie in the passenger seat...

Kids reaction?

 

[playin4beer]

Like I said, our Elf just moves around each night... inspired a little bit by this thread, I changed it up a little last night..Cheery Elf was found this morning in the driver's seat of a pink corvette with a brunette barbie in the passenger seat...

Kids reaction?

My 7 year old (pretty much the only one that's young enough to still believe) came running out into the kitchen to get me..She had a huge smile on her face and said "DAD! come look at Cheery!".. Then she says, "I wonder how he got the car up there"..It was up on a shelf on the computer desk.. "I told her he was probably flying around the house in it because he's magic"..And she got a visit from the tooth fairy last night.. It was a good morning for her.edit to add:Also, my 10 year old says to me "I didn't know Cheery was cheating on Tinkerbell"

 

[Black Box]

Also, my 10 year old says to me "I didn't know Cheery was cheating on Tinkerbell"

 

[Rayderr]

My kids are firmly in the "Santa has advanced technology to know if you've been bad or good so he doesn't need a low tech stuffed elvish minion" camp.

Thing is creepy and looks like it would try and hump the cat if it had a chance.

I've often thought that Santa needs to be updated. It worked back in the day when kids just got wooden toys, but now with Santa giving out Xboxes and Playstations, it just doesn't work. Or are we to believe that Santa is infringing on numerous patents, copyrights and trademarks and got his elves slaving away in a counterfeit toy shop?

 

[Angry Beavers]

Don't try to institute this when your kids are teens.My wife brought it home and was having fun with it the first couple of nights by putting it in funny situations only to wake up Saturday morning to it hanging by its neck with an iPod charger cord from the ceiling fan. For added measure, my son turned the fan on low so the elf was spinning slowly around and around as she entered the room.

 

[Jaysus]

My link

 

[playin4beer]

My link

 

[netnalp]

My kids are firmly in the "Santa has advanced technology to know if you've been bad or good so he doesn't need a low tech stuffed elvish minion" camp.

Thing is creepy and looks like it would try and hump the cat if it had a chance.

I've often thought that Santa needs to be updated. It worked back in the day when kids just got wooden toys, but now with Santa giving out Xboxes and Playstations, it just doesn't work. Or are we to believe that Santa is infringing on numerous patents, copyrights and trademarks and got his elves slaving away in a counterfeit toy shop?

Probably outsources to China.

 

[B-Deep]

My kids are firmly in the "Santa has advanced technology to know if you've been bad or good so he doesn't need a low tech stuffed elvish minion" camp.

Thing is creepy and looks like it would try and hump the cat if it had a chance.

I've often thought that Santa needs to be updated. It worked back in the day when kids just got wooden toys, but now with Santa giving out Xboxes and Playstations, it just doesn't work. Or are we to believe that Santa is infringing on numerous patents, copyrights and trademarks and got his elves slaving away in a counterfeit toy shop?

Probably outsources to China.

didn't you guys see Elf? They were cranking out Etch-a-sketches and taking a class on advanced graphics chip designelves are immune to copyright intellectual property laws

 

[Black Box]

elves are immune to copyright intellectual property laws

There's an Onion article in there somewhere with the RIAA, elves, copyright, etc...

 

[snogger]

I woke up this morning to a low humming noise.

Little *******...

Good Lord.

What choice did he have after she rejected him??

 

[Ray Karpis]

My link

 

[Usual21]

Woke up to find "Pancho" (yes, our elf is named Pancho) sitting on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and watching "Elf" the movie. Wife got up early today and set him up. My 5 year-old loves this Elf on the Shelf schtick.

 

[Elf On The Shelf]

Hating the makers isn't the same as hating me, right? Please don't hate me. I only wish to spread Christmas Joy!!

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Hating the makers isn't the same as hating me, right? Please don't hate me. I only wish to spread Christmas Joy!!

Stop. Now.

 

[Jaysus]

Booooooooo!

 

[Uwe Blab]

My link

 

[Rayderr]

Hating the makers isn't the same as hating me, right? Please don't hate me. I only wish to spread Christmas Joy!!

Well, that was a waste of an alias.

 

[Elf On The Shelf]

Alright, look, I'll cut the nice elf crap. You think I wanted this gig? The elves that had good standardized test scores get to work in the shop all day making toys and eating cookies. So because I have a learning disability and don't do well with a number 2 pencil I get jammed in a dark box 11 months of the year (not as fun as it might sound). Then when I finally get out I'm stuck all over the ####### house in odd places. Do they ever put me where I can see the HDTV that was bought on Black Friday so I can catch some football? Am I ever positioned in the bathroom so I can catch the house MILF getting out of the shower? Of course not.

And I got some news for you, I don't travel by magic to the North Pole to tell Santa how your little rats behaved. Lord knows if I could get there I wouldn't come back. And please don't complain about your kids not being able to touch me. I don't want their dirty fingers covered with snot/cheeto dust/Log Cabin syrup all over my chest. Seriously, would it kill you to have them wash their hands after they take a dump?

Anyway, it's a job so I guess I shouldn't complain. At least I'm not worrying about the fiscal cliff...

 

[Elf On The Shelf]

Hating the makers isn't the same as hating me, right? Please don't hate me. I only wish to spread Christmas Joy!!

Stop. Now.

Keep up the attitude and I'll report you to the Ombudsman.

 

[shuke]

Hating the makers isn't the same as hating me, right? Please don't hate me. I only wish to spread Christmas Joy!!

horrible

 

[Jewell]

My link

Between this and the vibrator, there is some gold in this thread.

 

[Ned]

A bunch of grumpy old stooges in here. Par for the course in the FFA, I guess.

Our boys love it.

 

[Elf On The Shelf]

Hating the makers isn't the same as hating me, right? Please don't hate me. I only wish to spread Christmas Joy!!

horrible

Gimme a break alright? Sometimes I have to try to act the part of the happy elf or I'll just go ####### nuts. Today I'm dangling from a pot rack in the kitchen with a crossbar jammed up my crotch. I'm hungry as all get out yet nobody offers me so much as a nibble of their bagel with cream cheese. I'll say this much, they're lucky I don't get back to report to Santa on what they really do here. These kids wouldn't get #### for Christmas, and don't get me started on the parents...

 

[NCCommish]

Hating the makers isn't the same as hating me, right? Please don't hate me. I only wish to spread Christmas Joy!!

horrible

Gimme a break alright? Sometimes I have to try to act the part of the happy elf or I'll just go ####### nuts. Today I'm dangling from a pot rack in the kitchen with a crossbar jammed up my crotch. I'm hungry as all get out yet nobody offers me so much as a nibble of their bagel with cream cheese. I'll say this much, they're lucky I don't get back to report to Santa on what they really do here. These kids wouldn't get #### for Christmas, and don't get me started on the parents...

I kind of like grumpy Elf.

 

[GoFishTN]

Alright, look, I'll cut the nice elf crap. You think I wanted this gig? The elves that had good standardized test scores get to work in the shop all day making toys and eating cookies. So because I have a learning disability and don't do well with a number 2 pencil I get jammed in a dark box 11 months of the year (not as fun as it might sound). Then when I finally get out I'm stuck all over the ####### house in odd places. Do they ever put me where I can see the HDTV that was bought on Black Friday so I can catch some football? Am I ever positioned in the bathroom so I can catch the house MILF getting out of the shower? Of course not. And I got some news for you, I don't travel by magic to the North Pole to tell Santa how your little rats behaved. Lord knows if I could get there I wouldn't come back. And please don't complain about your kids not being able to touch me. I don't want their dirty fingers covered with snot/cheeto dust/Log Cabin syrup all over my chest. Seriously, would it kill you to have them wash their hands after they take a dump?Anyway, it's a job so I guess I shouldn't complain. At least I'm not worrying about the fiscal cliff...

Bravo. Good save.