Make fun of your wife's spending habits in here (2 Viewers)

[Fat Nick]

My wife will buy things she likes in 2 or 3 sizes, take them home, try them on, then returns what doesn't fit.  It drives me nuts for so many reasons.

-It requires TWO trips to the mall (where she'll inevitably buy MORE stuff)

-it makes tracking spending on our credit card statement more complicated than what I do in finance at work because there are so many returns.  You can never isolate what she's actually spending (maybe intentional)

-It's wasteful because she often doesn't return the stuff promptly, which means the store then sends it to TJ Maxx or something because it's out of season by the time she returns it.  

 

[-OZ-]

One thing I still don't understand - WHY DO WE NEED SO MANY F***KING PILLOWS!?!?!?

Yeah, there's that. We have dozens between the beds and couches which end up on the floor. 

 

[Fat Nick]

Yeah, there's that. We have dozens between the beds and couches which end up on the floor. 

12 on our bed alone.  The sad thing is, we almost NEVER make the bed...except on the day the housekeeper is coming.  Every other day they're just piled in the corner.

We-make-the-bed-ONLY-on-the-day-the-housekeeper-is-coming.  

 

[fantasycurse42]

My wife is also into decorative pillows... I obviously hate them.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Speaking of Target we went to Vegas a few weeks ago and she was taking a smaller purse / wallet 

"Lets see I need my ID, credit card, debit card and oh...my Target card"

Me:  WTF would you need your target card in vegas

"You never know"

 

[SWC]

My wife is also into decorative pillows... I obviously hate them.

why do you hate them becuase you do not like the patterns or the fluffy rating on them or becuase you just generally hate stuff i will hang up and listen take that to the riddle me this bank bromigo

 

[fantasycurse42]

why do you hate them becuase you do not like the patterns or the fluffy rating on them or becuase you just generally hate stuff i will hang up and listen take that to the riddle me this bank bromigo

They have beads or patterns or something else on them that isn't comfortable to put against my back or head, so I just move them to the floor.

They serve no purpose. 

 

[-OZ-]

Speaking of Target we went to Vegas a few weeks ago 

 

[Wrigley]

Wife:  “We need to budget, budget, budget”

Me: “ok”

Wife: comes home with $500 purse 

Me: :drinksscotch:

 

[General Malaise]

Woke up this morning around 645am, my son is sleeping next to me and my wife is intently staring at her phone... I wipe my eyes and grab my phone to check emails. 

I have about 34 from American Express alerting me to large purchases and online purchases - now I'm fully awake... I look over at my wife and ask what she is doing.

"I'm cleaning out every store within 50 miles of hatchimal surprises!" She says this happily like she is some sort of genius. 

Me: Huh?

Her: It's the hot toy this year, they were released today, they're already sold out at Toys R Us!!

Me: How much money have you spent? 

Her: I've got about 110 of the hatchimal surprises, some other toys, these finger monkeys

Me: (Interrupting her) ####! Give me a ####### number

Her: About $9k

Me:

Looks like the FC's are going into the toy business.

I had to Google this.  Now I'm looking at buying their stock.

 

[General Malaise]

Toy industry analyst Jim Silver estimates Spin Master sold two million Hatchimals last year, logging about $80 million in revenue. He believes Hatchimals Surprise could be even a bigger success this shopping season.

"Having seen their new Hatchimals products for this year, I think the brand could triple sales to $250 million," he said.

Spin Master declined to comment on Hatchimals sales.

Spin Master is eager to grow Hatchimals beyond just toys.

"We're expanding into licensed goods like T-shirts, bedding, even costumes. The possibilities are endless," said Martin.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Yeah, there's that. We have dozens between the beds and couches which end up on the floor. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lp0-8Ibkczc

 

[glvsav37]

I can't overly complain, my wife doesn't by big things for herself. But what drives me mad is when she justifies to herself that she had to spend $75 at Kohls just because the $10 coupon was expiring that day. 

I'm  like who cares about the $10, you still lost me $65!! 

Esp with me working in advertising, its funny to see her fall for all the classic advertising pricing tricks they play when we are home.

 

[Kanil]

We-make-the-bed-ONLY-on-the-day-the-housekeeper-is-coming.  

This is so familiar and legitimately frustrating.  Why the #### am I paying her if the house is the cleanest it ever is 10 minutes before she shows up!?!??

 

[Kanil]

Wife:  “We need to budget, budget, budget”

Me: “ok”

Wife: comes home with $500 purse 

Me: :drinksscotch:

This too... except not scotch because "that's wasteful... you like beer".  

 

[fantasycurse42]

Was in Target today, guess how many Hatchimal Surprises I counted on the shelf - 17... Yup, 17.

Even the wife finally had a look of defeat in her eyes. I don't think I need to explain to her why people would prefer to buy them at Target for cost than off of FC50feedbackEbaysellerguy for double, but we still might need to have that talk as I start demanding she return some of these things. I did feel kinda bad bc she spent the entire morning calling and lowering her cost average - they had some promotion for 24 hours where these things were $5 off, so she was literally refunded hundreds, and another promotion of $20 off per $100 spent - she was on a roll and this is very out of character for her. 

She still doesn't have exact numbers of what she ordered or how much it cost, so there's that. 

 

[AAABatteries]

Wife got home yesterday afternoon from shopping at Costco.  The kids help her bring everything in and we are putting stuff away.  She starts showing me the extra stuff she bought.  A combo charger for devices, a laptop tray, a new mouse and some other stuff.  I just sit there in silence smiling and when she's done I just say, "600?"

Her:  

Me: "600?"

Her: the lightbulb coming on "oh, yeah - how did you know?"

Me: just sit there nodding and smiling

Her: "you looked at the receipt in my purse, didn't you?"

Me: "no, but you always spend 400-500 so I figured that was about right with the extra items"

Her: "yeah, we really spend too much there"

Me:  

 

[Fat Nick]

This is so familiar and legitimately frustrating.  Why the #### am I paying her if the house is the cleanest it ever is 10 minutes before she shows up!?!??

100% agree.  I had a heart-to-heart with my wife because every other Thursday becomes "house straightening night," because the housekeeper is coming.  I told my wife bluntly that I agreed to us getting a house keeper to help her from having to do all the cleaning.  She's essentially made it so -I- now have to help out with all the straightening in a rush, after I get home, get the kids to bed, and eat dinner...so the housekeeper can come clean.  It's become MORE work for me.

And before anyone says anything about it being sexist that I don't want to be straightening the house up despite living there, I handle ALL the landscaping and outdoor activities, dishes, AND kids bedtimes.  I've turned down hiring a landscaping company b/c it's too expensive.  I'm not cleaning too.

 

[Fat Nick]

My wife just texted me to let me know that she ordered 24 pair of pajamas from Kohls for our upcoming family X-mas photo shoot.  

24 pair.  

"3 different styles with multiple size options."  

We'll be "borrowing" 20 that we won't actually buy just so we can try them all on then return the rest.  Sorry if anyone actually NEEDS PJ's and knows their size.  

 

[fantasycurse42]

My wife just texted me to let me know that she ordered 24 pair of pajamas from Kohls for our upcoming family X-mas photo shoot.  

24 pair.  

"3 different styles with multiple size options."  

We'll be "borrowing" 20 that we won't actually buy just so we can try them all on then return the rest.  Sorry if anyone actually NEEDS PJ's and knows their size.  

Interested in a trade?

I'll give you 2 Hatchimal Surprises for 14 pairs of pajamas

 

[Fat Nick]

Interested in a trade?

I'll give you 2 Hatchimal Surprises for 14 pairs of pajamas

What am I going to do with the other 6 pair of pajamas???

ETA: Hatchimal Surprise sounds like either a good band name or a bad pot-luck dinner.

 

[Sand]

My wife is also into decorative pillows... I obviously hate them.

When my wife makes me make up the bed I make sure that the pillow arrangement contains some sort of lewd reference.  Usually phallic.  That gets me i trouble/out of work for a week or so.

Definitely worth it.

---

Just to add - my wife isn't horrible, except for shoes.  The dog ate a pair of random pumps last week and you'd have thought there was a five alarm fire.  I'm sure they've already been replaced.

 

[fantasycurse42]

What am I going to do with the other 6 pair of pajamas???

ETA: Hatchimal Surprise sounds like either a good band name or a bad pot-luck dinner.

They're the hot gift for little kids this holiday season. 

You can buy it from Kohl's right now for $69.95 or my wife for $140, good deal either way, IMO.

 

[Chemical X]

I have a "back" when it comes to bags.  my wife has always had a major bag thing.  doesn't help that we travel to Italy frequently.  literally, if you came to my house and asked me to look in the "back" I could find your wife a bag.  Many of them still have tags.  We have a trip coming up in march to Italy and she has already found a new Vuitton bag.

Also, this weekend she bought new running sneakers, some socks, a small light for running or dog walking.  She didn't like a pair of socks and the little crapola light and asked me to return them.  The credit was $48-.  $48- for a pair of socks and a light I can get at walmart for $1-?

She makes a pile of money, its her prerogative, but what is the bag thing?

 

[Fat Nick]

I have a "back" when it comes to bags.  my wife has always had a major bag thing.  doesn't help that we travel to Italy frequently.  literally, if you came to my house and asked me to look in the "back" I could find your wife a bag.  Many of them still have tags.  We have a trip coming up in march to Italy and she has already found a new Vuitton bag.

Also, this weekend she bought new running sneakers, some socks, a small light for running or dog walking.  She didn't like a pair of socks and the little crapola light and asked me to return them.  The credit was $48-.  $48- for a pair of socks and a light I can get at walmart for $1-?

She makes a pile of money, its her prerogative, but what is the bag thing?

Bags and shoes ALWAYS fit.  That's what it is.

Women always worry about how things fit, and those two things don't have the same issues as dresses, jeans, etc. 

 

[Sand]

Also, this weekend she bought new running sneakers, some socks, a small light for running or dog walking.  She didn't like a pair of socks and the little crapola light and asked me to return them.  The credit was $48-.  $48- for a pair of socks and a light I can get at walmart for $1-?

I'll half vouch for your wife here.  A decent (note I said decent, not top of the line) pair of running/cycling socks are $8 a pair.  The good ones are $15.  Crazy, but there is a huge difference.  Mentioning Walmart here is blasphemy.

On the light it depends on what kind of light.  Lights are pretty cheap.  

Ok, that's not half.  I'll 1/6 vouch for your wife.

 

[Chemical X]

I'll half vouch for your wife here.  A decent (note I said decent, not top of the line) pair of running/cycling socks are $8 a pair.  The good ones are $15.  Crazy, but there is a huge difference.  Mentioning Walmart here is blasphemy.

On the light it depends on what kind of light.  Lights are pretty cheap.  

Ok, that's not half.  I'll 1/6 vouch for your wife.

they were plantar fascism socks, but for that price she could go to the orthopaedist.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Wife: "We might get invited to that Minnesota wedding" 

Me:  :shuked:

Wife:  "you know, for the girl that lived next door to my dad that I haven't seen in 25 years"

Me:  "sounds expensive"

Wife:  "but I might want to go"

Sure honey, let's drop a couple racks on flight and hotel to go to some strangers wedding in Minnesota... in December

 

[E-Z Glider]

Not my wife, but my buddy's wife... He's at an all-inclusive resort in Antigua right now because his wife won a "free" trip for spending so much on hair-care products this past year. 

 

[ChiefD]

Getting ready to remodel our master bathroom. Demo starts in a few weeks. Just got done with our kids bathroom last fall.

Anyway, it's a small space, and has room for a 46" vanity. Which are impossible to find. So I'm going to have to find someone local to make me one. So my wife wants to buy a big mirror for that bathroom. In our other bathroom, we were able to put in a 48" vanity and mirror, so everything lined up pretty good.

So she is online shopping and finds a 48" mirror. ($300 or so)  Here's the conversation:

Me: It's not gonna fit.

Her: Yes it will, it's the same one I bought for the other bathroom.

Me: It's not gonna fit.

Her: Yes it will.

Me: No. The vanity in our bathroom is shorter than the other one. That mirror will hang over the side by 2" and look stupid.

Her: It will look fine.

Orders the mirror.

Shows up, so we take it upstairs and set it up over the current vanity just to see how it will look.

Her: That looks off for some reason.

Me:  <_< . No sh.it?

Her: 

Me: 

 

[Da Guru]

My wife spends thousands of dollars a year on the finest clothes and shoes, she is a VIP at Nordstroms and Von Maur as the sales people are always calling her to let her know about new styles and sales.  

Then on the other end she is addicted to stores like Dollar General and buys all this crappy one dollar no name cereal and lousy no name chips! It is only her an me now and I never eat that crap and end up throwing it all away.  So it is all gone so she thinks I am loving the cereal when I am throwing it away unopened.  I tell her we don`t eat chips that often so when we do at least buy a good tasting brand.

 

[jamny]

My wife mentioned the other day that she hasn't bought any new clothes, except for workout clothes, since around August 2016. She hates shopping.

 

[mr. furley]

100% agree.  I had a heart-to-heart with my wife because every other Thursday becomes "house straightening night," because the housekeeper is coming.  I told my wife bluntly that I agreed to us getting a house keeper to help her from having to do all the cleaning.  She's essentially made it so -I- now have to help out with all the straightening in a rush, after I get home, get the kids to bed, and eat dinner...so the housekeeper can come clean.  It's become MORE work for me.

And before anyone says anything about it being sexist that I don't want to be straightening the house up despite living there, I handle ALL the landscaping and outdoor activities, dishes, AND kids bedtimes.  I've turned down hiring a landscaping company b/c it's too expensive.  I'm not cleaning too.

my wife likes to say "i don't do house work.... that's women's work. expecting me to do women's work is sexist."

err,  but me doing all the yard work AND the house work is......?

 

[Bull Dozier]

Wife: "We might get invited to that Minnesota wedding" 

Me:  :shuked:

Wife:  "you know, for the girl that lived next door to my dad that I haven't seen in 25 years"

Me:  "sounds expensive"

Wife:  "but I might want to go"

Sure honey, let's drop a couple racks on flight and hotel to go to some strangers wedding in Minnesota... in December

Let me guess, this isn't exactly how she phrased this?

 

[Mr. Mojo]

I am very practical and my wife is the same way. After decades of marriage, we are now reaping the benefit of being that way. 

 

[DallasDMac]

I appreciate the fact my wife isn't a shopper. It's a big part of why I married her. After reading this thread, I appreciate her even more. I seriously don't know why some of you put up with the insane amount of shopping your wives do.

 

[Jackstraw]

My wife has at least 15k in belly dancing costumes in her lair. Probably that much in accessories. 

Considering the belly dancing hips I'll call it a push. 

 

[ghostguy123]

Wife: I just got $130 worth of clothes for $30.

Me: you mean you got $30 worth of clothes for $30, cause, ya know, clothes are on sale at all times.

Wife: whatever, i got a good deal.  And $50 of it was free cause I used that gift card my dad got us last Christmas.  

Me: so it was really $80

Wife: no, 50 of it was a gift card

Me: a gift card counts as cash babe. 

Wife: shut up

My wife isnt a huge wasteful shopper which is nice, but she is as financially illiterate as they come.

 

[mr. furley]

I appreciate the fact my wife isn't a shopper. It's a big part of why I married her. After reading this thread, I appreciate her even more. I seriously don't know why some of you put up with the insane amount of shopping your wives do.

define "put up with" and how to "not" put up with it

 

[Dan Lambskin]

define "put up with" and how to "not" put up with it

I complain about it, but I spend a lot of money on beer and gambling.   I just think the stuff she buys is dumb. 

I'm also a tightwad on some stuff but spend like I'm Johnny Manziel at a strip club on other stuff

"$1 for a new game on your phone kids...no way!"

"$250 on dinner and drinks...fire away"

 

[glvsav37]

turn the tables...I finally broke down and bought some new clothes.....been prob 2 years since I did a wardrobe refresh.

why? b/c i saw an email from one of my favorite brands, 40% everything ....and then I found another 20% coupon on line. got about 8 shirts, some briefs and a belt for $140...and I actually felt guilty about it. 

 

[glvsav37]

we are at the end of a home renovation and so now we are piling up bigger ticket items (in addition to the cost of the reno). So shopping with my wife has been fun to say the least. 

New den couch and chairs
New bedroom set and mattress for my daughter.
Flooring
etc.

then once that is done, we are demo'ing the whole kitchen. 
That isn't happening until January, but she already has all of her appliances on layaway since the summer. I'll give her credit though, she watches those prices like a hawk and when the price dips as much as $0.50, she is on the phone getting a price adjustment. 

Shopping for cabinets though...offfa. You would think she is a 5-star chef with the way she wants the kitchen set up. Me, I just said save money on the stove and just put in 4-5 telephones, each with a direct connection to our normal take out places. Bc thats whats gonna happen anyway. 

 

[UOFI_316]

Wife: I just got $130 worth of clothes for $30.

Me: you mean you got $30 worth of clothes for $30, cause, ya know, clothes are on sale at all times.

Wife: whatever, i got a good deal.  And $50 of it was free cause I used that gift card my dad got us last Christmas.  

Me: so it was really $80

Wife: no, 50 of it was a gift card

Me: a gift card counts as cash babe. 

Wife: shut up

My wife isnt a huge wasteful shopper which is nice, but she is as financially illiterate as they come.

My wife will go and buy $50 in clothes, come home and try them on again and decide she doesn't like them so she returns them.

2 weeks later she goes to buy different clothes

"I just got these two new shirts for only $15, they were on sale for $65 and then I used that gift card from the stuff I returned last week."

"So they were $65?"

"NO! Only $15"

I then just smile and go bang my head on the wall.

 

[Brunell4MVP]

My wife makes a ton of money.  I lucked out on that one.  So I never complain about her spending.  If she ever dumped me I'd have to get a real job.  So she can buy Louis Vuitton purses, David Yurman jewelry, and other crap all she wants.   She just went out and bought a new Ranger Rover without saying a thing  Not a peep from me..

I have found that the more occupied they are, the less time they have to shop.  She works her a$$ off, but the minute things get slow at the office, it's like a kid at Toys R Us.

 

[Thorn]

Wife: "We might get invited to that Minnesota wedding" 

Me:  :shuked:

Wife:  "you know, for the girl that lived next door to my dad that I haven't seen in 25 years"

Me:  "sounds expensive"

Wife:  "but I might want to go"

Sure honey, let's drop a couple racks on flight and hotel to go to some strangers wedding in Minnesota... in December

Only an idiot would willingly travel to MN in December.

 

[ghostguy123]

Maybe my wife gets it from her mom.

wife mom: I won $500 at the casino

me: cool, so you are up $500?

wife mom: huh?

me: so how much did you win?

wife mom: $500

me: so you came home with $500 more than when you left?

wife mom: no, I won $500 on the slot right when I got there

me: then what happened?

wife mom: I played for a while and ended up using that $500

me: so you didn't actually win anything

wife mom: I said, I won $500

me: how much did you take with you to the casino

wife mom: like $300

me: how much did you come home with?

wife mom: like $200

me: so you actually lost 100 bucks

wife mom: yeah but I won $500

 

[SacramentoBob]

We had a come to Jesus talk a few months ago when I found out she had spent about $10K at Ulta, Sephora, Target so far this year.  Partly my fault for not staying on top of this previously.  I made a google spreadsheet to track our spending and income on a monthly basis.  She seems much more invested in keeping the spending down.  She quit online shopping cold turkey once I put real numbers to it.  She gets genuinely excited when the expenses are less than the previous month.

 

[DallasDMac]

define "put up with" and how to "not" put up with it

See Bob's post above this. There's no need to put up with unfettered spending. I don't think expecting a person to be reasonable is, uhm, unreasonable.

 

[Limp Ditka]

I'm fairly certain that if a doctor botched a surgery she had, and there was a tip line on the receipt, she'd still give Dr Nick 15% just because it's there. 

 

[EYLive]

LadyLogicTM - Completely jacked up since Adam lost a rib.