My Dad And Cancer (1 Viewer)

[Joe Bryant]

Sorry to be a downer, but looks like this is Ikely my Dad's last Thanksgiving. He's been battling health issues (not uncommon at 82 years old), and they just got out of the Oncology office with news his cancer is not treatable and aggressive. The cancer type is "Spindle Cell" which is kind of rare. It has metastasized to his lungs which is bad news.

Thinking it's a matter of months.

My four adult kids will all be here tomorrow for Thanksgiving. Could use thoughts and prayers for that as I'm sure it'll be challenging. They all have great relationships with him so there's nothing weird, just the sadness that this may be the last Thanksgiving with him.

At his age, he's opposed to radical treatment that will significantly reduce quality of life in the time he has left. He's had several people he knows where it ended very badly with chemotherapy and other things.

I know y'all are so kind to me on stuff and I don't want this at all to be a sympathy thing. I know tons of folks here have had similar situations. I'm hardly unique here.

And again, sorry to be a downer.

I've been blessed miles beyond what's normal to have had my Dad as my close friend and business partner for 35 years. We have a great relationship and I see him at least weekly for lunch or get together.

His faith is very strong and he tells me he's ready to go if that's how it goes. Said he's way more worried about being 90 and feeling terrible and a burden than he's worried about dying.

So this isn't about sympathy or anything weird like that. No need to reply or anything. Y'all are my people and I wanted to let you know something big is in my life now.

 

[Sand]

As hard as it is, I hope you have a fulfilling Thanksgiving with your dad. I watched mine go through something similar and the time I did have with him was a gift.

 

[bigbottom]

Praying that your father has continued strength and peace as he finishes his journey and that you, your siblings, and your entire family are surrounded with love and light as you create new and lasting memories with him during the coming months. I suspect that this will be a very special Thanksgiving.

 

[whoknew]

Sorry to hear it. It is never fun. I hope you have a very special and memorable holiday season.

 

[3C's]

Man, well sorry to hear. I know it won't be easy but wishing you a special Thanksgiving.

 

[Ilov80s]

So sorry to hear that Joe. God Bless you and your family.

 

[DA RAIDERS]

Sending you all some love Joe. Tell your dad, that your internet friends, said he definitely did it right raising you. You’re a good man, and surely that’s a reflection of him.

I’ll raise a glass to papa Joe tomorrow.

 

[Keerock]

Praying for you, your dad, and your family to find strength and peace. Cherish the time he has, 82 is a good, long life, but still a punch in the gut news.

Best to you GB...

 

[higgins]

All the best to him/your family now & the upcoming months.

 

[urbanhack]

I'm so sorry Joe. I hope that you are all able to have a memorable time this thansgiving. Thoughts are with you and your family.

 

[Scoresman]

Sorry to hear Joe. I'm sure you'll make this Thanksgiving extra special.

 

[Galileo]

So sorry to hear this news. I will be thinking of you and your family this holiday season.

 

[IvanKaramazov]

Sorry to hear this, Joe. I deeply respect your dads decision for minimal treatment. I like to think I would make the same decision, but I worry that it would be difficult for the people around me, if that makes sense.

 

[Galileo]

Sorry to hear this, Joe. I deeply respect your dads decision for minimal treatment. I like to think I would make the same decision, but I worry that it would be difficult for the people around me, if that makes sense.

Yes and no. My mom is just shy of 87 and was diagnosed with colon cancer about a year and a half ago. She did have a surgery to remove about 1/3 of her colon, but she elected to not undergo any further course of treatment (against the doctor's recommendation). I completely understand her decision, and I was actually glad that is what she decided. It was a good decision for her. Fortunately, she is doing pretty well (at least with that issue). Everybody's circumstances are different though.

 

[Judge Smails]

So sorry Joe. I think about quality of life like your Dad does. I've had several family members and friends deal with a terminal cancer diagnosis, and those who decided against radical treatment had far better quality of life in hospice. They were clear headed and not ravaged by radiation, chemo, steroids, etc. Had beautiful interactions with them in their remaining days. I'm sure the entire Bryant family will savor their time with your Dad tomorrow. We had a patriarch of the family pass away 2 years ago. Was always the center of Thankgsiving. And we make a toast to him every year now. I'm sure your Dad will live through all of you and be celebrated long after he's in heaven. Still tough to go through. Take care.

 

[BroncoFreak_2K3]

Sorry to hear. As others have said, enjoy every minute you can with him.

I lost my Mom (80) and Dad (92) in 2021-2022, during COVID when I had very limited access to them in clinical and hospital settings even though I lived less than 5 miles from them. This was especially difficult for me. I feel like I never had a chance to really say goodbye until they were in hospice, and had very little understanding of what was going on. They too were believers , and had faith in an eternal life with the Lord. So I have that assurance that they now have a blessed eternal life and someday we will be reunited and it will be wonderful.

Though they are gone, there isn’t a day I that goes by that I don’t feel their presence or have a lasting thought about them that gets me through the day. This is what matters. They are always with me in spirit.

Thoughts and prayers for you and your family Joe.

 

[AAABatteries]

I’m sure Papa Bryant has led an amazing life and he’s leaving an amazing legacy - enjoy Thanksgiving together.

 

[Joe Bryant]

Thank y'all so much.

 

[El Floppo]

So sorry about the news, Joe.

Sending love to you and your family during these trying times.

 

[STEADYMOBBIN 22]

So sorry to hear Joe. Thoughts and prayers going forward for your dad, your family and you.

Don’t forget to take care of yourself.

-Kevin

 

[Willie Neslon]

I'm very sorry to hear this. Wishing you, your dad and your family a wonderful Thanksgiving together.

 

[matttyl]

So sorry to hear this. Even more unfortunate is that I’m going through a very similar situation. My father’s cancer has also returned (metastasized) and is also in his lungs - very bad news. He’s about 2 months into chemo treatments, which actually haven’t treated him too badly. Whole family is getting together for Thanksgiving tomorrow, fingers crossed not for the last time as a whole.

 

[nirad3]

Sorry to hear this, JB. My dad was in the hospital last Thanksgiving (and Christmas for that matter) and passed on in January. It's so hard when our loved ones are in these situations during the holidays. My thoughts and prayers are certainly with you, your dad and your entire family this holiday season.

 

[FreeBaGeL]

Dang, so sorry to hear this JB. I totally respect your dad's outlook on this and I'm glad you will all get to spend Thanksgiving together.

 

[bryhamm]

Sorry to hear this Joe. T&P

 

[jwb]

I hope your family enjoys the day tomorrow, Joe.

 

[Hoh]

Prayers of strength and serenity for the Bryant family. I think the man has earned a second piece of pumpkin pie, extra Cool Whip.

 

[Chaos34]

Aw Joe, so sorry to hear. You reduced me to tears and will be persistently in my thoughts this holiday season. The timing of my mom's untreatable diagnosis was the same 10 years ago. The decision for hospice met with some division between my siblings. There's still bitterness between, well, those who understood and those who didn't. Remembering her last Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years is what teared me up. She was living with me by then. The last 4 months she was constantly surrounded by many loved ones, lots of laughter, lots of love. Hospice was the right decision and we did right to by her, celebrating every moment we could of having her with us. May your father's last days be filled with a thousand special moments and as little suffering as possible. Hang in there friend. It can be rough.

 

[fatness]

My four adult kids will all be here tomorrow for Thanksgiving. Could use thoughts and prayers for that as I'm sure it'll be challenging. They all have great relationships with him so there's nothing weird, just the sadness that this may be the last Thanksgiving with him.

Sorry that your dad's dying. I lost my mom last December (Parkinsons dementia) and lost my dad to sudden severe cancer in 2008. I still miss him. We respected each other and were friends, and loved talking. And he could make me laugh like no one else.

There's an opportunity here for a memorable day for your dad and your kids on their last Thanksgiving together. Sometimes the best way to handle awkward sadness is to go right at it, and talk and laugh as much as possible together, kind of like 'damn the torpedoes, we're all here right now and that matters'. Family bonds between members a couple generations apart are priceless, and memories often get passed on to subsequent generations. I still remember a story my grandfather told me about his grandfather, and how they'd skip out on putting up hay to go fishing without getting caught by his grandmother. We're all just links in a chain.

 

[Hugsy_Malone]

So sorry, Joe. Much love and thoughts and prayers and wishes your way. I hope you have the best Thanksgiving that you can.

 

[Sullie]

I'm so sorry to hear this Joe.

 

[Corporation]

So sorry to hear Joe. My aunt was very much the same way and passed away yesterday at 83. Praying for peace and comfort for your family at this time.

 

[zamboni]

I’m so sorry, Joe. Best wishes to you and your family. I hope it is a very special Thanksgiving and you clearly have many special memories to cherish.

 

[Jayrod]

His faith is very strong and he tells me he's ready to go if that's how it goes.

Praying for you and your family, Joe. Grateful for the above.

 

[ProstheticRGK]

Sorry for the news, Joe. From the stories you've shared, your dad seems like an incredible man. I hope you're moved to share some more stories here.

As an RN, I encourage you to have some really open, frank conversations about the measures he wants done when his health starts to fail and get a POLST form filled out. Maybe even a consult with Palliative Care, to outline what treatments are ok, and which he'd rather not endure.

As someone who has had a few family members go through this, as well, I'll say that God is good, and there is a sense of peace and grace that is provided in situations like this. Don't miss an opportunity to tell him how much you love him and how much he has meant to you. I imagine this Thanksgiving will be one of the most memorable you've ever had. Praying for peace and grace for you, your pop, and all the family.

 

[UncleZen]

While it is sad, think of this as a blessing in that you know it's coming and you get to enjoy this time with him and the family. Many people did not have that chance.

 

[Snoopy]

My mother was diagnosed with cancer just before Thanksgiving and passed away 2 months later. She was limited to a broth diet for Thanksgiving. So this hits too close for me.

 

[Joe Bryant]

Thank y'all. I was hesitant to share as I didn't want it to seem like a sympathy thing. But this was super helpful. Thank y'all.

 

[STEADYMOBBIN 22]

There's an opportunity here for a memorable day for your dad and your kids on their last Thanksgiving together. Sometimes the best way to handle awkward sadness is to go right at it, and talk and laugh as much as possible together, kind of like 'damn the torpedoes, we're all here right now and that matters'. Family bonds between members a couple generations apart are priceless, and memories often get passed on to subsequent generations. I still remember a story my grandfather told me about his grandfather, and how they'd skip out on putting up hay to go fishing without getting caught by his grandmother. We're all just links in a chain.

I wanted to say something along these lines but Fatness said it better than I could have.

 

[snellman]

So sorry to hear Joe. Cancer is a terrible journey to go through as a Family. I have been through it many times. It definitely sounds like your dad is at peace, so the biggest thing is making sure he is comfortable. My father in law had Cancer the day I met him along with other health issues and they went through many experimental treatments. It may have helped him live a little longer, but towards the end he was in a lot of pain with the cancer and it seemed the treatments only made it worse, which is also no way to live. Enjoy every moment you have with him. The cancer sucks, but if there is one benefit, it seems to help you prepare as much as you can for the loss that is coming.

 

[dickey moe]

Prayers for your dad and the rest of the Bryant family.

 

[Atomic Punk]

This community you built has said it all, so I’ll just add my prayers for you and your family. Have a great Thanksgiving with that family you are blessed with.

 

[GroveDiesel]

Thank y'all. I was hesitant to share as I didn't want it to seem like a sympathy thing. But this was super helpful. Thank y'all.

Joe, you’ve been so kind, supportive, and sympathetic for so many others, it’s the least everyone can do to be supportive for you as well.

There’s never a good way to lose a loved one, but I think there can be gifts in certain ways. We had very similar timing and circumstances with my grandfather years ago. I wish I had realized the opportunity I had to simply ask questions and have him tell stories that I’ll never hear or know now because I didn’t understand the opportunity I had.

A really cool thing my mom’s family did recently was a couple of my uncles sat down and simply recorded an interview of sorts with my mom’s oldest brother. They asked him questions about his childhood, about the family, about his life, etc. What an awesome thing it was to be able to give that recording to the rest of the family to hear stories never heard, find out family history that wasn’t know or was forgotten, to laugh and cry together. Maybe you’ve already done something like that, if so, being able to relive those together while you still can would be an amazing blessing.

May God bless you and your family’s time together richly and extravagantly. May there be much joy, love, and laughter over the next weeks.

 

[BeTheMatch]

Sorry to be a downer, but looks like this is Ikely my Dad's last Thanksgiving. He's been battling health issues (not uncommon at 82 years old), and they just got out of the Oncology office with news his cancer is not treatable and aggressive. The cancer type is "Spindle Cell" which is kind of rare. It has metastasized to his lungs which is bad news.

Thinking it's a matter of months.

My four adult kids will all be here tomorrow for Thanksgiving. Could use thoughts and prayers for that as I'm sure it'll be challenging. They all have great relationships with him so there's nothing weird, just the sadness that this may be the last Thanksgiving with him.

At his age, he's opposed to radical treatment that will significantly reduce quality of life in the time he has left. He's had several people he knows where it ended very badly with chemotherapy and other things.

I know y'all are so kind to me on stuff and I don't want this at all to be a sympathy thing. I know tons of folks here have had similar situations. I'm hardly unique here.

And again, sorry to be a downer.

I've been blessed miles beyond what's normal to have had my Dad as my close friend and business partner for 35 years. We have a great relationship and I see him at least weekly for lunch or get together.

His faith is very strong and he tells me he's ready to go if that's how it goes. Said he's way more worried about being 90 and feeling terrible and a burden than he's worried about dying.

So this isn't about sympathy or anything weird like that. No need to reply or anything. Y'all are my people and I wanted to let you know something big is in my life now.

Sorry, Joe.

 

[Chadstroma]

Screw Cancer (the JB version)

Prayers for a time that the family can cherish even if it is bitter sweet knowing the time spent is precious and fleeting.

 

[need2know]

Sorry to be a downer, but looks like this is Ikely my Dad's last Thanksgiving. He's been battling health issues (not uncommon at 82 years old), and they just got out of the Oncology office with news his cancer is not treatable and aggressive. The cancer type is "Spindle Cell" which is kind of rare. It has metastasized to his lungs which is bad news.

Thinking it's a matter of months.

My four adult kids will all be here tomorrow for Thanksgiving. Could use thoughts and prayers for that as I'm sure it'll be challenging. They all have great relationships with him so there's nothing weird, just the sadness that this may be the last Thanksgiving with him.

At his age, he's opposed to radical treatment that will significantly reduce quality of life in the time he has left. He's had several people he knows where it ended very badly with chemotherapy and other things.

I know y'all are so kind to me on stuff and I don't want this at all to be a sympathy thing. I know tons of folks here have had similar situations. I'm hardly unique here.

And again, sorry to be a downer.

I've been blessed miles beyond what's normal to have had my Dad as my close friend and business partner for 35 years. We have a great relationship and I see him at least weekly for lunch or get together.

His faith is very strong and he tells me he's ready to go if that's how it goes. Said he's way more worried about being 90 and feeling terrible and a burden than he's worried about dying.

So this isn't about sympathy or anything weird like that. No need to reply or anything. Y'all are my people and I wanted to let you know something big is in my life now.

Thinking of you and yours buddy

 

[shuke]

Very sorry, Joe. Savor the remaining time you have.

 

[kupcho1]

I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. I'm sure it will be a great time to reminisce; try and make it a celebration.

 

[James Bond]

Sorry to hear. I've been there and it's never easy. Thank goodness you have some notice so you can savor the time you have left. T & P Buddy.

 

[jvdesigns2002]

Damn. Thoughts and Prayers to you and your entire family. I hope that you guys can fill whatever remaining time that he has with wonderful memories and experiences.