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Blackmail - serious question (2 Viewers)

Just goes to show that even in the most private, appropriate situation with a trustworthy recipient they aren’t the best idea and I’m going to be advising my kids when they’re older to never send for any reason.

Always been my take/policy but it does make you wonder with AI if it really will even matter any more. I’ll still never do it.
 
Do you typically get hot noods when the scammers initiate the conversation?

I may need to make a profile.
No. Most dating apps don’t even allow you to send pics. I think Bumble is the only one out of the 3 popular apps (Hinge, Bumble and Tinder)

Hinge is the only one I like. Bumble sucks and Tinder is 90% fake profiles and scammers.

If they are sending you nudes or anything overly provocative from the jump, they are 99% of the time scammers

If they try to get you over to WhatsApp, it’s an instant delete. Crypto scammers for sure.

99% of the time if it’s a hot Asian girl profile, don’t even bother. Left swipe and move on. Scammer.
That’s what I mean. I don’t care if it’s a scam. I’m not sending them anything. At least not of me. Sounds like a party.
All the nonsense happens off the apps. The inside app convo is used to get you comfortable and promises of pics or whatever after you send your number.

Most of the time after you send your number you don’t even hear from them. They just unmatch and likely sell your number to outside sources to spam text you.

I’d never give out my number. Always ask for their number for you to text them. Even then they still might be shady.

After a while you start to notice little things in your app convo to know if they are real or not. If their English is broken, abort. If they are instantly sexual, abort. If they speak in totally proper tones and weird run on sentences, abort. Real women are more casual in their words, use emojis, etc (you can just tell)
 
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All the nonsense happens off the apps. The inside app convo is used to get you comfortable and promises of pics or whatever after you send your number.

Most of the time after you send your number you don’t even hear from them. They just unmatch and likely sell your number to outside sources to spam text you.

I’d never give out my number. Always ask for their number for you to text them. Even then they still might be shady.

After a while you start to notice little things in your app convo to know if they are real or not. If their English is broken, abort. If they are instantly sexual, abort. If they speak in totally proper tones and weird run on sentences, abort. Real women are more casual in their words, use emojis, eye (you can just tell)
It's been close to five years since I've been on the apps. I remember being able to tell pretty quickly if it was a bot/scammer. I'm guessing the interface and a lot of stuff has changed, but the basic common sense stuff hasn't.
 
It's been close to five years since I've been on the apps. I remember being able to tell pretty quickly if it was a bot/scammer. I'm guessing the interface and a lot of stuff has changed, but the basic common sense stuff
Yep this is very true for someone who’s used the apps for a while. But the reality is most guys don’t ever get any matches with decent looking women (or any women at all) so when one happens they REALLY want to believe it’s true and the horny male irrational mind takes over.

I have fairly decent success on apps and at the beginning of being single again, my irrational mind still took over at times. For a guy who never has matches or not great with women (or unhappy in their marriage) I can see them being easy pickings. And that’s majority of men on apps. I’m sure the scamming can be pretty lucrative
 
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Interesting, this thread was the first postings from OP since 2021.
I'm shocked. :fishing:
I really don’t think it’s fishing. Details from his original post and what we were ultimately able to get further embarrassing truth details out of him….it checks out to how these scams go down. He would’ve shared more wife, pic sending, etc details from the jump if it was a fish.
 
no texts yet, dont know if they just got bored when i didnt send the money yesterday, they plan on contacting later, decided to send pics or just moved on from me. To answer many of you, i am sorry i did it and i dont plan on doing it again
 
I guess from having my cell #, i am not sure. I never sent anything else
I don’t believe you.
I think he's referring to NewlyRetired's question about how they have contact info. The answer is they don't, that's the bluff part.
Your phone number is tied to social media accounts (Facebook). They go there to find your friends lists and show you pics/vids proving they can send stuff to them through Facebook.
Never make your friends list displayable to the public.
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
 
no texts yet, dont know if they just got bored when i didnt send the money yesterday, they plan on contacting later, decided to send pics or just moved on from me. To answer many of you, i am sorry i did it and i dont plan on doing it again
Why are you not just blocking the number and moving on?
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
You don't even have to pay for basic information like possible former addresses and people at those addresses that might be related to you. I imagine the OP gave them his name and at least the town he lives in. Just put your name and town in a site like fastpeoplesearch.com and you might be surprised how much info you see right away without paying a dime.

ETA: you don't even necessarily need the name and town... just put the cell number in that site (under search, hit the phone tab at top) and all that info might come up - at least my wife's number did, while mine still only shows previous owner's of the number
 
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It's been close to five years since I've been on the apps. I remember being able to tell pretty quickly if it was a bot/scammer. I'm guessing the interface and a lot of stuff has changed, but the basic common sense stuff
Yep this is very true for someone who’s used the apps for a while. But the reality is most guys don’t ever get any matches with decent looking women (or any women at all) so when one happens they REALLY want to believe it’s true and the horny male irrational mind takes over.

I have fairly decent success on apps and at the beginning of being single again, my irrational mind still took over at times. For a guy who never has matches or not great with women (or unhappy in their marriage) I can see them being easy pickings. And that’s majority of men on apps. I’m sure the scamming can be pretty lucrative

I mean just look at the Ashley Madison doc that just came out and the lawsuit it stems from. Most of the women on there aren’t real and the site’s security is next to nothing.

In short, online dating certainly has its positives as it provides a platform not previously available, but men need to realize that if a woman likely won’t give you a second glance at a bar or club, she isn’t giving you a second glance online either.
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
You don't even have to pay for basic information like possible former addresses and people at those addresses that might be related to you. I imagine the OP gave them his name and at least the town he lives in. Just put your name and town in a site like fastpeoplesearch.com and you might be surprised how much info you see right away without paying a dime.

ETA: you don't even necessarily need the name and town... just put the cell number in that site (under search, hit the phone tab at top) and all that info might come up - at least my wife's number did, while mine still only shows previous owner's of the number
This is pretty eye opening.
I typed in my work number and my name, work address, home address, cell #, and all previous phone #'s came up ... going back about 3 decades.
Along with every person in my family, some extended family, and a few people that I don't know. Kinda scary knowing this much info can be had with just a work phone number.
 
Serious advice here:

This is a blessing in disguise. It's a wakeup call to address your behaviors, stop doing stupid and destructive **** online, and focus on what this means about the state of your marriage. Further, this could have wound up being much, much worse. So, count your lucky stars, fix your behavior, and, if you love your wife and want to be married, maybe buy her some flowers on the way home today.
 
In short, online dating certainly has its positives as it provides a platform not previously available, but men need to realize that if a woman likely won’t give you a second glance at a bar or club, she isn’t giving you a second glance online either.
It's way worse online than in real life. Women on apps are delusional because ALL WOMEN are getting tons of likes and matches because guys in apps will usually just swipe on anything to try and get a hit. So, all these app 4's are thinking they are 8's because of all the attention they are getting...so then they feel like they deserve that 8 guy. When these 4's are out in real life they aren't getting approached, so they crawl back to the apps to make themselves feel better and get that validation.

They say that 20% of guys on apps are getting with 80% of women on apps. Only the top tier guys are getting the action, and I believe it. It's rough out in these streets for the guys.
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
You don't even have to pay for basic information like possible former addresses and people at those addresses that might be related to you. I imagine the OP gave them his name and at least the town he lives in. Just put your name and town in a site like fastpeoplesearch.com and you might be surprised how much info you see right away without paying a dime.

ETA: you don't even necessarily need the name and town... just put the cell number in that site (under search, hit the phone tab at top) and all that info might come up - at least my wife's number did, while mine still only shows previous owner's of the number
This is pretty eye opening.
I typed in my work number and my name, work address, home address, cell #, and all previous phone #'s came up ... going back about 3 decades.
Along with every person in my family, some extended family, and a few people that I don't know. Kinda scary knowing this much info can be had with just a work phone number.
I'm finding this a useful tool to learn more about your neighbors ... since it lists your neighbors as well.
How old they are, where they use to live, how much they paid for their house, etc.
I'm diving deep into this rabbit hole.
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
You don't even have to pay for basic information like possible former addresses and people at those addresses that might be related to you. I imagine the OP gave them his name and at least the town he lives in. Just put your name and town in a site like fastpeoplesearch.com and you might be surprised how much info you see right away without paying a dime.

ETA: you don't even necessarily need the name and town... just put the cell number in that site (under search, hit the phone tab at top) and all that info might come up - at least my wife's number did, while mine still only shows previous owner's of the number
This is pretty eye opening.
I typed in my work number and my name, work address, home address, cell #, and all previous phone #'s came up ... going back about 3 decades.
Along with every person in my family, some extended family, and a few people that I don't know. Kinda scary knowing this much info can be had with just a work phone number.
I'm finding this a useful tool to learn more about your neighbors ... since it lists your neighbors as well.
How old they are, where they use to live, how much they paid for their house, etc.
I'm diving deep into this rabbit hole.
Now you just need the photos so you can profit.
 
It probably isn't a bad idea to take a few hours one night or weekend to remove yourself from the online directories. There are dozens of them out there, they get your personal data from your county/state government, the USPS, utility companies, loan companies, data brokers, data leaks/breaches, etc.

I was shocked that some of them had every address I have ever lived in going back 25 years, as well as emails and phone numbers, work info, relatives information, neighbors, etc.

I followed the step by step instructions of two websites and made a little spreadsheet to keep track of the directory website, the information they had, my removal requests date and email sent from, when the removal was processed, etc. I think I was able to completely erase myself from all of the databases (or at least what they show to the public) except for one resume that was leaked from LinkedIn and still shows up like herpes. When you look my family members up it doesn't even list me on their pages anymore. This was around a year ago and everything is still clean, but I am much more careful now with what I share and with whom.






Good luck OP. Hope the scammers forget about you and you are able to get things at home on the right track, whatever that may be.
 
Sad that there are teenagers offing themselves because of situations like this.

It's heartbreaking.

I know someone who got involved in something similar.

21 year old guy.

He was on a dating app and things were going well with a "girl". She asked if they could take it offline and asked for his cell number.

He gave his cell # to "her". Then "she" immediately sent the guy nude pictures with a message saying, "Here are the pics you asked for."

A few hours later the "girl's dad" called saying he found the guys number on his "16 year old daughter's" phone and she's gone off the rails sending photos to guys.

And that now the guy has child pornography on his phone and he's calling the police and hangs up.

An hour later the "police" call and say a father has reported that the guy has nude pictures of his daughter on his phone and she's 16 and they want to talk to him.

An hour later, the "dad" calls and says he's going to ground the daughter for a month but he's calmed down now and may not press charges if the guy can venmo him $5,000 and then he can drop everything.

Sure, we might see this as a scam.

And some people have others to talk to like this forum.

Most people know not to send pics of themselves.

But I know lots of people who would give their cell phone # to a girl.

And that's all it took to start the scam.

The guy I know is ok and got through it but he thought he was in serious trouble for a while.
 
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Use their phone number to sign up for a mortgage quote. They’ll be too busy dealing with 500 phone calls to bother you anymore
I like it, especially after he's blocked their number. Drive them nuts or maybe run some burner phone up to its text message limit.
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
You don't even have to pay for basic information like possible former addresses and people at those addresses that might be related to you. I imagine the OP gave them his name and at least the town he lives in. Just put your name and town in a site like fastpeoplesearch.com and you might be surprised how much info you see right away without paying a dime.

ETA: you don't even necessarily need the name and town... just put the cell number in that site (under search, hit the phone tab at top) and all that info might come up - at least my wife's number did, while mine still only shows previous owner's of the number
This is pretty eye opening.
I typed in my work number and my name, work address, home address, cell #, and all previous phone #'s came up ... going back about 3 decades.
Along with every person in my family, some extended family, and a few people that I don't know. Kinda scary knowing this much info can be had with just a work phone number.
I'm finding this a useful tool to learn more about your neighbors ... since it lists your neighbors as well.
How old they are, where they use to live, how much they paid for their house, etc.
I'm diving deep into this rabbit hole.
that site is crazy!
 
During our time dating, RacistEx would send my nudes/fun short videos when I’d be at work and she’d be home bored or whatever. I never shared them (eh, except maybe showed a close buddy/colleague in live time but I never electronically shared them) and respected her privacy. Shortly after we broke up, and at a point where I didn’t see a need to delete them (i.e. I didn’t have another girlfriend yet), my phone got stolen when I was on the court playing a pickup basketball game. The phone got bricked pretty shortly thereafter, and I warned RacistEx immediately, but she did find them posted on some amateur sites later. She wasn’t happy but fortunately she didn’t blame me as I had told her about what happened immediately.

 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
You don't even have to pay for basic information like possible former addresses and people at those addresses that might be related to you. I imagine the OP gave them his name and at least the town he lives in. Just put your name and town in a site like fastpeoplesearch.com and you might be surprised how much info you see right away without paying a dime.

ETA: you don't even necessarily need the name and town... just put the cell number in that site (under search, hit the phone tab at top) and all that info might come up - at least my wife's number did, while mine still only shows previous owner's of the number
This is pretty eye opening.
I typed in my work number and my name, work address, home address, cell #, and all previous phone #'s came up ... going back about 3 decades.
Along with every person in my family, some extended family, and a few people that I don't know. Kinda scary knowing this much info can be had with just a work phone number.
I'm finding this a useful tool to learn more about your neighbors ... since it lists your neighbors as well.
How old they are, where they use to live, how much they paid for their house, etc.
I'm diving deep into this rabbit hole.
that site is crazy!
Right!!!. I put my celly cell in and got a ton of correct info about me. I also saw a bunch of email addresses that were supposedly mine, but ones that I never had. Those are probably all email addresses created by scammers.
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
You don't even have to pay for basic information like possible former addresses and people at those addresses that might be related to you. I imagine the OP gave them his name and at least the town he lives in. Just put your name and town in a site like fastpeoplesearch.com and you might be surprised how much info you see right away without paying a dime.

ETA: you don't even necessarily need the name and town... just put the cell number in that site (under search, hit the phone tab at top) and all that info might come up - at least my wife's number did, while mine still only shows previous owner's of the number
This is pretty eye opening.
I typed in my work number and my name, work address, home address, cell #, and all previous phone #'s came up ... going back about 3 decades.
Along with every person in my family, some extended family, and a few people that I don't know. Kinda scary knowing this much info can be had with just a work phone number.
I'm finding this a useful tool to learn more about your neighbors ... since it lists your neighbors as well.
How old they are, where they use to live, how much they paid for their house, etc.
I'm diving deep into this rabbit hole.
that site is crazy!
entered my ph# and the result was for my brother who has never had my ph#. he was also listed as the owner of an old address of mine. it did have associations with my name so i clicked on that and it had an incorrect age for me along with a few other pieces of info that were close but not accurate.

so.. interesting but not perfect.
 
I dont have friend list displayable on FB. i dont know where they got them from. Like I said, 2 of the first names were my parents and they were deceased long before FB was around
There are tons of sites out there where you can pay to try find info on someone. Google your own name and you may be surprised what is available.
You don't even have to pay for basic information like possible former addresses and people at those addresses that might be related to you. I imagine the OP gave them his name and at least the town he lives in. Just put your name and town in a site like fastpeoplesearch.com and you might be surprised how much info you see right away without paying a dime.

ETA: you don't even necessarily need the name and town... just put the cell number in that site (under search, hit the phone tab at top) and all that info might come up - at least my wife's number did, while mine still only shows previous owner's of the number
This is pretty eye opening.
I typed in my work number and my name, work address, home address, cell #, and all previous phone #'s came up ... going back about 3 decades.
Along with every person in my family, some extended family, and a few people that I don't know. Kinda scary knowing this much info can be had with just a work phone number.
I'm finding this a useful tool to learn more about your neighbors ... since it lists your neighbors as well.
How old they are, where they use to live, how much they paid for their house, etc.
I'm diving deep into this rabbit hole.
that site is crazy!
Is there a fee????
 

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