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Caught wife texting another guy and hiding it - what's the play? (1 Viewer)

stl - so do you have any lingering doubt or suspicion that she had sex with this guy?
I doubt she had sex. I know they met once for drinks and she was home 8:30ish.... Its possible. I told her that when I'm old and dying to let me know what really happen so I can die in peace......
If that works for you, great.

Personally, I don't think I could go on with that festering inside my brain. Right now you are stuck not knowing but taking her word for it, I guess...and simultaneously living in this state of being where you have access to all her passwords etc., going forward.

I think I would have demanded all the text message records. Reviewed them and make my determination from that information. The text messages would have told you in black and white if they had sex and/or to what degree the relationship developed.

I am pretty sure I would want all the information out and then make an assessment and plot a course of action.

 
the way you're ok w the fact that she plowed this dude makes me think youve done the same at some point in your marriage.

correct

 
sometimes people have to venture off the beaten path to figure out that the beaten path is the path they still want .I know that when i cheated in the past i appreciated my GF that much more...i felt horrible and realized how much i actually did love her...it took being with someone else to prove it to myself. I know that sounds crazy but......

 
So your wife who can't get enough action (2-3 times a day for 20 years?!?! Wow.) is hiding her relationship with another man? Yikes...

 
If you caught her texting, she had sex with the guy. If you caught her having sex with the guy, she's had sex with 10 guys. They are sooooo much better at this stuff than we are.

 
So your wife who can't get enough action (2-3 times a day for 20 years?!?! Wow.) is hiding her relationship with another man? Yikes...
Ever see those shows about the women who have 50 orgasms a day? It's debilitating. They can't sit at a desk or drive a car without having an overwhelming need to flick the bean. Some of them wear one of those rabbits under their panties 24/7 so they can get off anytime.
 
So your wife who can't get enough action (2-3 times a day for 20 years?!?! Wow.) is hiding her relationship with another man? Yikes...
Ever see those shows about the women who have 50 orgasms a day? It's debilitating. They can't sit at a desk or drive a car without having an overwhelming need to flick the bean. Some of them wear one of those rabbits under their panties 24/7 so they can get off anytime.
they must leave wet stains everywhere they go....women are so freakin lucky

 
You always have to be on the lookout for warning signs of a rut, especially if someone feels like they're taken for granted or unappreciated. After about 10 years, my wife fell into a little bit of a depression. Might have been brought on by a death in the family or just getting older but it seemed like she was just questioning "Is this all there is?" I gave her some space but support as she worked her way through it. Who knows, maybe she did get shtupped by someone else during that time. I don't care, what I don't know won't hurt me. All I know is I could tell she was coming out of it when she started laughing at my stupid jokes again. 10 years later, we are happier than we've ever been.

You just have to get over that hump until you wake up one day and realize that you do have it good and this is what I want for the rest of my life. It's a great feeling.

GL bro. Don't let the negativity here ruin it. If you find out something happened, then that's a different story.

 
I doubt she had sex with him, definitely blew the guy but at least she kept her cooch for you. Plus I'm guessing she has gone down on you more in the last two months than the last two years, am I right? So you have that going for you which is nice. As long as you don't get a mental image of your wife sucking off this coworker in the front seat of his car everytime you and her have relations I think you are good.

 
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.

 
I doubt she had sex with him, definitely blew the guy but at least she kept her cooch for you. Plus I'm guessing she has gone down on you more in the last two months than the last two years, am I right? So you have that going for you which is nice. As long as you don't get a mental image of your wife sucking off this coworker in the front seat of his car everytime you and her have relations I think you are good.
####### heartless :lol:

 
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
this is terrible advice brohan having a wife is not about winning it is about being happy man what you said is messed up take that to the wrong way to wrong way bank

 
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
this is terrible advice brohan having a wife is not about winning it is about being happy man what you said is messed up take that to the wrong way to wrong way bank
Different strokes for different folks?Edit:

If I had reason to believe my wife boinked another dude. I'm getting even or I'm getting a divorce.

 
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Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
this is terrible advice brohan having a wife is not about winning it is about being happy man what you said is messed up take that to the wrong way to wrong way bank
Different strokes for different folks?Edit:

If I had reason to believe my wife boinked another dude. I'm getting even or I'm getting a divorce.
if you have to get even you SHOULD be divorced ...as that relationship is done

 
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
this is terrible advice brohan having a wife is not about winning it is about being happy man what you said is messed up take that to the wrong way to wrong way bank
Different strokes for different folks?Edit:

If I had reason to believe my wife boinked another dude. I'm getting even or I'm getting a divorce.
if you have to get even you SHOULD be divorced ...as that relationship is done
That's probably well said.

 
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
If that is your attitude, why even be in the relationship at all. Sounds like a miserable existence to me.

 
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
OP should definately listen to this sage advice from a Walgreens employee who can't get laid or move out from his parent's house.

 
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
If that is your attitude, why even be in the relationship at all. Sounds like a miserable existence to me.
He isn't speaking from experience.

 
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
If that is your attitude, why even be in the relationship at all. Sounds like a miserable existence to me.
He isn't speaking from experience.
I know. I am pretty sure he is a still a virgin.

 
SIDA! said:
Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
If that is your attitude, why even be in the relationship at all. Sounds like a miserable existence to me.
I'd rather be in no relationship than be in one where someone is unfaithful, not sure why that is such a bizarre concept.If I'm not cheating then there's no excuse for my wife not to be cheating as well. I would never do that to someone.

 
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SIDA! said:
SproutDaddy said:
SIDA! said:
Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
If that is your attitude, why even be in the relationship at all. Sounds like a miserable existence to me.
He isn't speaking from experience.
I know. I am pretty sure he is a still a virgin.
Wrong. I was dating this chick a few years back. She cheated on me, so I cheated back when the opportunity presented itself. She ended up cheating again so I walked away from the situation.

Can't turn a ho into a housewife. If someone strays once, they'll stray again. Any guy deserves better than a ho who is gonna do things behind your back. Self respect.

 
Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
you're an idiot - oh I just realized who wrote this. Makes more sense now...
 
Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
you're an idiot - oh I just realized who wrote this. Makes more sense now...
Sorry I'm not whipped. I obviously am not married and that changes things but I would be repulsed if I knew my wife fooled around and I took her back. It's not cool and there's so much opportunity in 2015 to stick around with someone who may cheat again if she feels in a rut again.Edit:

I'd like to think one of you guys have had enough balls to shut down a women who has cheated on you.

 
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Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
you're an idiot - oh I just realized who wrote this. Makes more sense now...
Sorry I'm not whipped. I obviously am not married and that changes things but I would be repulsed if I knew my wife fooled around and I took her back. It's not cool and there's so much opportunity in 2015 to stick around with someone who may cheat again if she feels in a rut again.Edit:

I'd like to think one of you guys have had enough balls to shut down a women who has cheated on you.
Cheating on someone to get "even" because they have cheated on you isn't a display of "balls." It's a display of pettiness and low character. No disrespect intended.

 
stlrams said:
we're making an effort to spend more alone time going out for happy hour, dinner, movies etc. We were stuck in a rut doing the same old. i suspect it happens to most marriages at some point where people lose sight of what makes a marriage work...
Date nights works for many to break the rut. Take weekend vacations somewhere new, get to know each other again type of thing. Plan something every week so there is something to look forward to.

 
Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
you're an idiot - oh I just realized who wrote this. Makes more sense now...
Sorry I'm not whipped. I obviously am not married and that changes things but I would be repulsed if I knew my wife fooled around and I took her back. It's not cool and there's so much opportunity in 2015 to stick around with someone who may cheat again if she feels in a rut again.Edit:

I'd like to think one of you guys have had enough balls to shut down a women who has cheated on you.
Do you realize that you are contradicting yourself every other post?

 
SIDA! said:
SproutDaddy said:
SIDA! said:
Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
If that is your attitude, why even be in the relationship at all. Sounds like a miserable existence to me.
He isn't speaking from experience.
I know. I am pretty sure he is a still a virgin.
Wrong. I was dating this chick a few years back. She cheated on me, so I cheated back when the opportunity presented itself. She ended up cheating again so I walked away from the situation.

Can't turn a ho into a housewife. If someone strays once, they'll stray again. Any guy deserves better than a ho who is gonna do things behind your back. Self respect.
brohan i have a pretty rough time some days my job is not fun sometimes the world around me has changed a lot and basically things did not always turn out as good as i thought maybe they would but when i am feeling crappy about it thank the big kahuna that i have posts like yours to read and realize that it could be a lot worse take that to the bank

 
SIDA! said:
SproutDaddy said:
SIDA! said:
Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
If that is your attitude, why even be in the relationship at all. Sounds like a miserable existence to me.
He isn't speaking from experience.
I know. I am pretty sure he is a still a virgin.
Wrong. I was dating this chick a few years back. She cheated on me, so I cheated back when the opportunity presented itself. She ended up cheating again so I walked away from the situation.

Can't turn a ho into a housewife. If someone strays once, they'll stray again. Any guy deserves better than a ho who is gonna do things behind your back. Self respect.
brohan i have a pretty rough time some days my job is not fun sometimes the world around me has changed a lot and basically things did not always turn out as good as i thought maybe they would but when i am feeling crappy about it thank the big kahuna that i have posts like yours to read and realize that it could be a lot worse take that to the bank
Real tough, brohan.

 
A glass of wine, my favorite easy chair, and the ol' SWCer taking em to the bank on a Friday night...

 
sbonomo said:
Eminence said:
Thinking about this more, if you ever get the chance to cheat on your wife for some meaningless sex I'd jump at the opportunity. If she gets wind of it, tell her it was just drinks. For me, that's the only way I think I'd ever feel "even".

I have a lot of pride and I hold grudges though. The fear of the unknown would drive me nuts and this would be the only way I'd feel I "one upped" my SO in the situation.
you're an idiot - oh I just realized who wrote this. Makes more sense now...
Sorry I'm not whipped. I obviously am not married and that changes things but I would be repulsed if I knew my wife fooled around and I took her back. It's not cool and there's so much opportunity in 2015 to stick around with someone who may cheat again if she feels in a rut again.Edit:

I'd like to think one of you guys have had enough balls to shut down a women who has cheated on you.
Cheating on someone to get "even" because they have cheated on you isn't a display of "balls." It's a display of pettiness and low character. No disrespect intended.
this is what I came to write....em, I get you are an immature kid without a clue about life. Just stop posting advice for people that do have a clue. It make you look even worse than you already do. Eta: I don't want to put you down but you just bring this on yourself. You live I'm your parents basement and work at Walgreen's....don't judge others...
You didn't need to eta that.

 
Ignore eminence. He's a complete beta with an alpha chip on his shoulder. It's like a modern form of the Napoleon complex.

Every woman willing to sleep with him well have such low self esteem that she will eventually cheat on him. Unless he changes one day, that is his future.

 
Ignore eminence. He's a complete beta with an alpha chip on his shoulder. It's like a modern form of the Napoleon complex.

Every woman willing to sleep with him well have such low self esteem that she will eventually cheat on him. Unless he changes one day, that is his future.
Not defending em but aren't you a known cuck? That is pretty beta.

 
Ignore eminence. He's a complete beta with an alpha chip on his shoulder. It's like a modern form of the Napoleon complex.

Every woman willing to sleep with him well have such low self esteem that she will eventually cheat on him. Unless he changes one day, that is his future.
Not defending em but aren't you a known cuck? That is pretty beta.
uh, no. My wife and I have considered swinging but never done it. And I'm not into the whole stand in the corner watching while another man does my wife thing... The only reason I've considered it as I like banging other women and think orgies would be fun.But if another man banged my wife, I wouldn't be to torn up about it if I was getting my fun too. I wouldn't feel threatened... Pretty much the opposite of beta to be that comfortable and secure IMO

 
Ignore eminence. He's a complete beta with an alpha chip on his shoulder. It's like a modern form of the Napoleon complex.

Every woman willing to sleep with him well have such low self esteem that she will eventually cheat on him. Unless he changes one day, that is his future.
Not defending em but aren't you a known cuck? That is pretty beta.
What in the holy Hades is your obsession with Hulk?
 
Not sure if he is just misinformed or just trolling. Either way, not a big deal. My honest answer is there, he can read it an move on, or just keep trolling. Im not really worried about it IMO

 
Ignore eminence. He's a complete beta with an alpha chip on his shoulder. It's like a modern form of the Napoleon complex.

Every woman willing to sleep with him well have such low self esteem that she will eventually cheat on him. Unless he changes one day, that is his future.
Not defending em but aren't you a known cuck? That is pretty beta.
uh, no. My wife and I have considered swinging but never done it. And I'm not into the whole stand in the corner watching while another man does my wife thing... The only reason I've considered it as I like banging other women and think orgies would be fun.But if another man banged my wife, I wouldn't be to torn up about it if I was getting my fun too. I wouldn't feel threatened... Pretty much the opposite of beta to be that comfortable and secure IMO
I couldn't handle the thought of another dude railing my wife, regardless if I had 3 chicks on me at the time. I'm not sure if that's beta or what but she's mine alone.

 
Unless your wife was a virgin, pretty sure some other dude has railed her. You can't handle even the thought of that?

It's only sex, people. Relax. R-e-l-a-x.

 
Wondering what is more upsetting to the OP: The thought of his wife banging the coworker or the thought of the Pats taping the Rams SB practice?

 
It's funny honestly, I'm advocating dumping a girl who cheats on you and all of you act like that's blasphemy.

I feel like a lot of you need to take a trip back to when you still had balls. You're a man. Anyone women who treads on you, treads on the king, treads on the bread winner needs to be put in her place.

One of the biggest problems I see with society is that we let women do whatever they want and nobody holds them accountable.

Her being your wife is even more reason to hold it against her, imo. If a girl cheats, find one that won't.

 

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