Captain Cranks
Footballguy
My fiancee and I have been having a difficult time 'hearing' each other at times and decided to go to an Emotionally Focused Therapy counselor to get us in touch with what might be causing the disconnect. The therapist is Christian and, at the outset, asked whether it was ok that she use her faith perspective when she thought it applied. Despite being an atheist, I was fine with this because my fiancee is Christian and I know how to ignore that type of stuff. The first 3 sessions of the therapy started off fine and had me feeling like this was the correct method of counseling that we needed. All 3 sessions were attended by the both of us. However, the following two sessions were 'individual' as the counselor wanted to discuss our upbringing and past relationships alone.
Yesterday, my fiancee has an individual session just before mine. After my session, I drove over to her place so we could spend some time together. We discussed our respective sessions to which she tells me the counselor had referred her to Bible verses last week that guide Christians on whether they should marry non-Christians. The interpretation is pretty clear that the Bible teaches that they should not. During this week's session, the counselor follows up and asks what she thought about the verses. My fiancee told her what she thinks they meant but that she doesn't care and she is committed to a relationship with me. The counselor then says, 'What do you think God would feel about that?' and then goes on to say she doesn't want to be a 'cafeteria Christian'. My fiancee was pretty upset by the episode and didn't want to go back, at least for another individual session. Despite this obvious misstep on her part, I still want to continue with the therapy with the caveat that she nix any further Christian elements and that it's only couples sessions going forward.
So what do you do in this situation? Cancel the next appt and never see her again? If so, do you bother explaining why? Do you ask for a refund?
TL;DR version - A couples therapist with a Christian background is referring my fiancee to Bible verses which say Christians shouldn't marry non-Christians. What do you do?
Yesterday, my fiancee has an individual session just before mine. After my session, I drove over to her place so we could spend some time together. We discussed our respective sessions to which she tells me the counselor had referred her to Bible verses last week that guide Christians on whether they should marry non-Christians. The interpretation is pretty clear that the Bible teaches that they should not. During this week's session, the counselor follows up and asks what she thought about the verses. My fiancee told her what she thinks they meant but that she doesn't care and she is committed to a relationship with me. The counselor then says, 'What do you think God would feel about that?' and then goes on to say she doesn't want to be a 'cafeteria Christian'. My fiancee was pretty upset by the episode and didn't want to go back, at least for another individual session. Despite this obvious misstep on her part, I still want to continue with the therapy with the caveat that she nix any further Christian elements and that it's only couples sessions going forward.
So what do you do in this situation? Cancel the next appt and never see her again? If so, do you bother explaining why? Do you ask for a refund?
TL;DR version - A couples therapist with a Christian background is referring my fiancee to Bible verses which say Christians shouldn't marry non-Christians. What do you do?