my in-laws refuse to make decisions. especially when they're gathering for any type of social event. it's always a last second flurry of calls, escalating anxiety about who is doing what, when, where, how, etc.
one year my mother in law started thawing the turkey ON THANKSGIVING MORNING. and fed it to us barely cooked just a few hours later. those of us dumb enough to politely eat even small amounts of it wound up violently ill that night. that's largely why i hate turkey today.
in ensuing years, we ate finger foods like meatballs (which my MIL makes for every occasion which are just thawed and warmed), a veggie plate and pie that was earned at the morning's turkey trot. not because we couldn't collectively pull together the cost of a thanksgiving dinner, but because doing so meant coordination and communication which is an impossibility.
the last few years, because they can't get their **** together and agree on anything, i've funded the whole meal and bought what i wanted. first couple years there was griping, but #### em. risking a 13 lb. turkey being in the oven at 250 for a couple hours then landing on my plate is not a risk i'm willing to take anymore.